“Today” was Yesterday

Today I spent some glorious time in my garden.

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There is one gi-normous prickly plant in my backyard which I just-as-soon wished someone would remove from my garden.  It is big and razor sharp.  This summer I tried to trim off big, ugly, tall, dry stalks, but there were so many spines I was often poked really hard.  I just try to ignore this plant hoping some day I will find a gardener to remove it.

Today I looked at it and it was stunning.  I’ve lived in Mi Casa for about a year and a half.  I don’t remember ever seeing these beautiful flowers from this plant – which Cory told me is a yucca plant.

I just looked it up on Wikipedia…yep…it’s a yucca plant.  I shall name mine “Yucky Yucca.”

Yucca_filamentosa

Per Wikipedia:  Yucca filamentosa

Looking at Yucky Yucca reminds me that even though things look somewhat ugly in my life right now (divorce paperwork came through finalizing things, President stuff depresses me, not sure what church means anymore, life seems unfair when it seems like….well, I don’t want to John-bash,  but my counselor helped me realize I am jealous that his life seems to be going along smoothly, while mine is yucky) …even though all I can sometimes see are prickly spines ready to wound me…my life IS going to bloom.  I am a flowering plant and my life IS going to bloom.

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Today (which was really today) I went for a walk.

I haven’t had a good walk in months.  Since I started training for the half marathon in June, I have been on the plan.  While on the plan I was timing my runs and my walks.  There was always a need to meet some pace goal.  Since the marathon, I took a couple of weeks off from any exercise.  This week I started back up and was still timing myself to see how much I had lost my pace.

But today I just walked for the sake of walking, no timing.  I love walking.  It is my prayer time, my God time, my music time, my thinking time.  It was so wonderful.  Here are a few pictures from my walk around the neighborhood.

 

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I am happy.  Here are some prayers:

—Prayers of thanksgiving for Benjamin’s 18th birthday.  Benjamin and Cole make my heart happy every day.  I loved having lunch with Benjamin on Wednesday and watching Cole perform with the band on Thursday. I love listening to Cole whistle.

—Prayers of thanksgiving for my church.  On Thursday I got to sing Jesus songs with a group of people from lots of different church buildings.  We celebrated a church which saw 300% growth….they went from 1 to 3 members.  On a different front…I have 6 friends who I call my church now.  I’m so thankful for the way we lovingly work together despite our differences.

—And I am thankful for Man#3.  I have to come up with a new name for him. He is such a pleasure to me.  Not prickly.

 

 

 

 

 

4 thoughts on ““Today” was Yesterday

  1. Great job looking for the beauty in things. I love when the universe sends happy surprises. It reminds me to step back and look at things from a different perspective. I am currently working on reminding myself that people’s lives are much more messy and complicated than they seem to me. (Speaking of which, it’s not John bashing if you think his life looks like it’s going more smoothly 😉, but I’m sure it’s not as smoothly as you think- he just had lower expectations than you. 😋 ). Thanks for another beautifully written reflection.

    If love to hear more about this church, maybe I’ll join too. . .

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    • We should go for a walk….you know this church… 🙂 You’ve been there. 🙂

      The John thing….I didn’t bash like I wanted to….I can do a lot of blaming for the fact that things are easy for him with regard to how his life is the same, same house, same church, same Sunday dinners and holidays with family, same bunch of stuff…pretty much everything the same except that he doesn’t have any responsibility for me and my moods and passions and opinions. And some new recent developments in his life, which I could not figure out WHY it was bothering me. Until I went to counseling and Charlene helped me see what was right before my eyes. I am bitter because my life is upside down because of decisions he unilaterally made without my consent. I am angry that I feel he gave me limited bad choices for my circumstances. I don’t mean to bash now…just wanted to clarify.

      And once I saw where my bitterness came from….I could look it in the eye and say, “Ah yes….there you are.” And then I can move forward…knowing that regardless of his decisions and their impact on my life, I have the choice to make the best life possible. And I am going to do that regardless of whatever happens. And knowing that things are well…things are well….and so I release the bitterness out into the wide, wide universe and say….bye bye.

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